High Horoscopes | Feb. 16, 2016


The HIGH TIMES weekly astrological forecast, complete with strain recommendations!

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Every warrior needs to clean her sword from time to time. You hacked your way through the gore and came out victorious. A dark bird sat on your shoulder, waiting to pick the remains from your weapon at the end of each battle. This carrion eater has been your companion for many years. At first it was a welcomed companion, and the relationship felt symbiotic. But now as the war is ending, the bird is getting hungrier. It will pick your hair gently at first, but then a nip at your ear will lead to violence. Clean out your war chest, put away your protective tools, and send the bird on its way. Strain recommendation: Ben Johnson


When I set my mind to you dear Taurus, I hear the sounds of a train chugging along a mountain pass. Closing my eyes, I see you sitting in your private cabin, watching the world whip by in the darkened evening, the sun setting beyond a ridge. It is beautiful and calming. You are on a journey, heading in the right direction, all because you said Yes. Thank you for greeting life with a welcoming hug. Now please relax and drift into a meditation with the beats of the tracks beneath you. The rhythm of the train is your internal music; you are fantastically alive and in sync. Strain recommendation: Hindu Kush


According to Norman Doidge’s book The Brain that Changes Itself, our neuropathways are plastic and able to change shape. I imagine the brain as the top of a snowy mountain, with various thoughts like ski courses that plummet down from the peak. The more time you spend on one particular course, the more worn-in a path it will become, until it is so easy and smooth to traverse that all other ways seem difficult in comparison. This is how you become stuck in a rut of thinking. Gemini, it’s time to do some bushwhacking. Ski the uncharted territory and let that bad-habit run be slowly covered in snow. Strain recommendation: Green Ribbon


Have you heard whispers in the magical jungle around you? There are secrets echoing through the vines, protected words hiding in unopened flowers. You need to entertain a new strategy to navigate this wild territory. There is some wonderful potential in the perfumed air but there could be snakes in the trees and leeches in the water so I wouldn’t traipse around naively. Words are more than conduits of thought—they can be poisoned darts if hurled by careless gossipers. Keep your eyes open while you enjoy the beauty. Strain recommendation: Double Dream


A glorious ballroom filed with fawning admirers await your entrance. You have been working for weeks towards making these contacts and they have shown up. Not only did they come, they are actively excited to meet you. So now you don’t need to be the wrangler anymore. It would do your cause a great service if you remembered that you are the centerpiece of this show and let them come to you. Don’t be over eager, don’t glad-hand—sit on your throne, and be the self-made royal that you are. Strain recommendation: Berry White


Here’s one of those memos from the universe for you, Virgo: finish off those Valentine’s day chocolates, watch all the TV you can bear, play all the solitaire you want for now—but by the end of this week, if you haven’t packed it all in for healthier and more productive ways, then something’s going to force you to. I suggest that it would be better to be the one making the choice to clean your insides up, rather than letting your body unceremoniously send you the message. Strain recommendation: Tahoe OG Kush


You know that ship, the one that you’ve been waiting for to come in? Well, she just docked. She’s not the luxury cruise ship you’re hoping for—more of a cute dinghy, but she’s waiting for you at the pier. How wonderful and rare it is to be shown the true fruits of our labors. Lean back, and let the cabin boy peel you a grape. Don’t worry, it’s all paid for, work’s been notified that you’ll be gone for the week, and your dependents will depend on someone else for the time being. Trust the universe to allow you this time to just… enjoy. Strain recommendation: LSD


Whoa there lil’ buddy, RELAX. Stop with your endless fiddling and chatting and probing and sneaking. The answer will come when it is good and ready, and the more you poke the less it will want to be positive. The answer is like a little kitten recently put in your care. It needs to be under the bed for a bit. Sure, sit near it, sing a little, play with a string and put out treats to lure it if you really must, but if you go under there to pull it out, you’re gonna get scratched and your first chance to establish trust will be burnt. Strain recommendation: White Widow


A precipice lies before you. Before jumping, maybe sit for a while and ask yourself why you want to jump in the first place. If the answer is anything short of ‘because I just need to do it’ then I would seriously reconsider. Maybe setting up camp and pondering your choices while your eyes settle fuzzily on the flickering fire could be helpful. You could always jump tomorrow. Tonight could be a good time to shower your partner with love, or have a drink with your ol’ buddy, telling long stories under the stars. Tomorrow will always be there. Strain recommendation: Northern Lights


You are known to be a bold little goat, so when you feel shy it tends to be misconstrued as laziness, or resistance. Not fair, you think, why aren’t I allowed to be scared sometimes? Sorry to break it to you, but you have been cut some slack before, for things you don’t even know you do. So instead of keeping score, just try explaining that you feel intimidated, that you need some help. Instead of seeking compassion, show some for yourself by not letting their expectations cloud your soul. Strain recommendation: Super Silver Haze


A cool wind of clear communication is blowing through your home. The windows are open, no emotional furniture is blocking the path, and the colors of your walls are ‘tonally in sync’ with knowing your mind and speaking it honestly, without fear. With this comes the dual joy of earthly pleasures blooming in your garden and good emotional energy in the bedroom. Your house is in fantastic condition. So why are you looking at cheap apartments in the kinky part of town? Do you often need a little cigarette ash in your angel food cake or do you just run scared when life looks too good to believe? Strain recommendation:  Master Kush


You’ve started noticing that the cave you built for yourself is a little small and dank. Well hallelujah, finally you are ready to chuck the shovel aside, put on your boots and head outside. Blinking into the bright sun like a baby chipmunk, the faith you lost in your own ability to handle the mess is back! Time to take the next step! Search for food? Find a mate? Make a home? The recognition you deserve will come once you commit. It might not be easy, and it will feel scary, but it’s time. My gawd it’s time! Strain recommendation: Golden Goat