If you’re at all like us, you’re already holding a hefty buzz and could also benefit from an overflowing bowl of Orange Kush and a glistening platter of greasy hors-d’oeuvres (I’ll take some egg rolls, baby quiche, and prosciutto-wrapped asparagus please). An extra-large slice of sofa space would also be ideal right now, because it’s about time to sprawl out, scarf some snacks, and de-com-fucking-press from the stress induced by having to leave the house every day.
After a relentless week devoted to sitting in traffic, dealing with the antics of a dozen-too-many douchebags, and spending an embarrassing amount of hours behind a computer screen without getting up for a bathroom break, we’re sure you’re as ready as we are to call it quits to the grind. And I know the perfect solution: changing your body to a horizontal position, getting a whole lot more high, and sitting behind a much larger screen.
I’ve got a monster Dutchie drying up on my coffee table waiting to be sparked — just as soon as I can find something to watch — and you should go and prepare in the same fashion. Then, queue up the ol’ Netflix, get ready to put on something straight-up-stupid, and unplug from reality; after all, you’ve earned that right.
To make it even easier, here’s a list of all the weedy watchables you can instantly stream on the ‘Flix right now. Go grab your weed bag and lighter, your favorite pipe, bong or vape, and snag some sweet, salty, and/or crunchy snacks: it’s time to binge out!
Weed Wars
A show like this might make you jealous, but it’s still cool to see the world’s largest marijuana dispensary getting some tube time. Check out the cross-section of potheads in Oakland, California as they come in to buy their medicinal nugs, and get a taste of what it’s like to work sling trees legally.
Lynching Charlie Lynch
Poor Charlie Lynch. Dude got asked by civic leaders in Morro Bay, California to open a pot dispensary back in 2006, which seems like a pretty great thing to have happen to you. Unfortunately, the Feds decided to fuck up his life because federal law and state don’t mix, and then someone made a movie about the ensuing shitshow. You’ll want extra cannabutter on your popcorn during this one.
Degenerate Art: The Art and Culture of Glass Pipes
Some artsy stoner made this gorgeous glass documentary. Learn about where color-changing pipes originated, and explore the underground, multi-million dollar industry that the Feds can’t seem to put a dent in. Plus, glass blowing is seriously cool — and seriously dangerous — so watching this movie will make you appreciate your glass piece more than you already do, which is saying a lot.
The Union: The Business Behind Getting High
“BC Bud” also known as “Beasters,” has surely graced your bong and/or blunts, and rightfully so: the $7 billion (that would be Canadian dollars) British Columbian underground industry illegally exports nearly all of its crops to the United States. Go in-depth and peer into the lives of people involved in the illicit trade of the most famous mediocre marijuana strain on the planet.
Cash Crop
Yet another movie about weed in California, Cash Crop takes viewers on a road trip through to the Emerald Triangle, the area where the country’s best chronic is grown. Prepare to salivate with envy at the bushels of bud you’ll see in this film.
Clerks
Take a trip back to the weirdness of New Jersey in the 90s — and in black and white, no less — with the movie that launched Silent Bob and Jay’s — as well as Kevin Smith’s — career. This might be the best black and white movie you’ve ever watched; it may also be the worst, but that’s for you to decide. Either way, you’ll get a kick out of listening to the German guy sing “Berzerker” and hearing about how Dante’s girlfriend blew 37 different guys.
Hansel & Gretel Get Baked
If you’re into gory b-movies that probably should never have been made, then this one’s for you. There’s a creepy old lady who uses her awesome chronic to lure unsuspecting stoners into her lair of evil. Fake blood begins to ooze.
Crystal Fairy & the Magical Cactus
I don’t want to give anything away about this indie flick starring a shaggy-haired Michael Cera and an equally shaggy-pubed Gaby Hoffmann trying to find a hallucinogenic cactus while road tripping through Chile, but I’ll tell you this: you’re going to want to jump through the screen with an electric buzzer when you see Crystal Fairy’s bush, and Cera’s character is a douche.
Super High Me
After taking a period of time to cleanse himself of weed, comedian Doug Benson goes on a 30-day, pot-smoking streak (a.k.a. every month of the year for us, except for months with more or less than 30 days) and showcases the effects a la Morgan Spurlock’s documentary Super Size Me. Smoke along with Doug throughout the movie for optimal viewing pleasure.
Mac & Devin Go to High School
Snoop Dogg and Wiz Khalifa star as high school kids who get caught up in the world of weed in this made-for-stoners movie. The school is named N. Hale High, named after rapper Nate Dogg (whose real name is Nathaniel Hale in a perfect twist of fate), and Andy Milonakis makes an appearance. Expect plenty of absurdity.
