Here’s a common stoner scenario: You and your crew have just huffed down a faaaaat L. In your euphoric haze, you all begin to realize that there’s something vital missing from your almost-perfect picture -- snacks. The fridge is barren, save for some pickles and other random condiments, and after debating whether or not to attempt quashing your craving with a spoonful of strawberry jelly, a shot of syrup, and a crunchy dill sandwich stacker, you conclude that everyone would be much better off if you got your asses mobilized and headed over to the nearest hoagie, grinder or sub shop.
As we all know, not all of the establishments that base their revenue on edibles involving sliced cold cuts and bread are created equal (you know who you are, metallic-looking roast beef users), so HIGH TIMES has compiled a short list of some of the nation’s most stonerific sandwich spots; that way, you can steer clear of yoga mat heroes and other nasties, and, instead, satisfy your rumbling stomach with deli-cious combinations you never imagined.
We encourage you to get really, really high before venturing to any of these places, as it will only heighten the delectability factor. And, per usual, we’d love to hear what your favorite stoner sandwich shops are (and NO, we don’t give a fuck about fast food, so none of that, please), so let us know if we left your go-to munchie locale off the list.
Half Fast Subs - Boulder, CO
Ever since weed became legal for recreational purposes in Colorado, things have been moving at a slightly slower speed in the Centennial State. Thankfully, nobody seems to have noticed at Half Fast Subs, one of the pillars of the University of Colorado at Boulder community, because the sandwiches rock so hard that speed isn’t an issue. With an extensive selection of vegetarian subs, such as local faves like Baked Tofu (with green peppers, carrots, sprouts, cukes and honey mustard) and roasted eggplant with sun-dried tomato spread, roasted red peppers, onions, mushrooms, tomato and provolone, this is the spot to veg out. (Meat-lovers will be equally enamored by the menu, so don’t feel left out.)
M & P Biancamano, Hoboken, NJ
Across the Hudson River from New York City lies the quaint town of Hoboken, where you can fuggedabboud horrific hoagie chains and opt for endearing, family-run Italian delis like M & P in their stead. Over 30 years old, this low-key shop is home to enormous hot and cold heroes piled with the likes of chicken cutlets, meatballs, capicola, sopressata, pepperoni, and assorted salamis -- along with some of the hottest cherry peppers in existence (for those who like to breathe fire after smoking it). The owners are there working every day, and the food always feels like it’s made with love. Try any Italian cold cut combo on their crispy bread; you’ll love it (although it may be so large you’ll want to dissect it instead of eating it like a traditional sandwich). Also noteworthy: M & P won Hoboken’s “Mutz Fest” in 2014 for having the best homemade fresh mozzarella in town, and the owner likes to give out samples to those who’ve never tried it before. All you have to do is ask.
Munchies 420 Cafe - Gainesville and Sarasota, FL
What’s in a name? At Munchies 420 Cafe near UF, the name says it all. Stoned students flock here for cheesy, fried yummies like broccoli and cheese bites, cream cheese poppers and “Dankalicious chicken nugs,” which are coated in a blend of sesame, teriyaki and BBQ sauce, black and white sesame seeds, and served with a side of ranch. But this article is about sandwiches, and Munchies 420 has some unbelievably stonerific selections. We recommend the Fat Dickie, which starts as chicken Philly with the works (onions, mushrooms and peppers), but subs in chicken fingers for grilled chicken. It is then topped with mozzarella sticks, onion hoops and cheddar cheese sauce to create one ooey-gooey crunchfest that is sure to induce you into a food coma.
Cheba Hut - Locations in Arizona (5), Colorado (5), Oregon (2), San Diego, CA, Albuquerque, NM, Madison, WI, and at the University of Iowa
This may come as a surprise to potheads who have never heard of it, but Cheba Hut has become a pioneer in franchising a business with a stoner theme. With 16 locations and counting, this shop serves up sandwiches in three sizes -- “Nugs” (4-inch), “Pinners” (8-inch) and “Blunts” (12-inch) -- and divides their menu (which is laden with nearly every possible weed reference) into sections aptly dubbed “Top Shelf,” “Mid-Grade,” “Munchies,” and “Cottonmouth Cures.” HIGH TIMES is a fan of the “White Widow,” featuring chicken breast, bacon, mushroom and provolone topped with “home-grown” ranch dressing. Bong rips to that!
Jerry’s Sandwiches - Chicago, Il (locations in both Wicker Park and Andersonville)
Ohhh, boy, do we LOVE Jerry’s Sandwiches here at HT. The menu cranks the quality factor up a few notches from some of the other shops on the list, and features mouthwatering munchies with proteins like house-made turkey meatloaf, root beer-glazed ham, Cajun buttermilk-fried chicken and garlic-and-herb-rubbed roast beef. There are so many zany combinations, including a sandwich called “Luis M” which comes with chicken salad, cold hickory-smoked sirloin, avocado, Swiss, and mango-chipotle chutney. We, of course, recommend a sandwich called “Stoner,” a grilled cheese on challah bread that comes loaded with mac ‘n’ cheese, American cheese, smoked gouda, arugula, applewood-smoked bacon and Crystal hot sauce. Stone appetit!
Liuzza’s By the Track - New Orleans, LA
If you find yourself stoned (and, most likely drunk, too) at the New Orleans Jazz Fest, there’s no better place to stumble for post-show munchies than Liuzza’s By the Track. While NOLA is known for premo po’ boy places aplenty, there’s something ethereal about Liuzza’s signature dish: the BBQ shrimp po’ boy. This simplistic sandwich features nothing more than fresh shrimp sauteed in a New Orleans BBQ sauce (a world apart from the thick sauces used in other regions, NOLA BBQ sauce is super liquidy and black pepper dominant) stuffed into a French bread pistolette, but once you try it for the first time, you’ll be addicted. The bread absorbs the sauce like a scrumptious sponge, but the outer edges maintain their crunch to counter the texture of the shrimp and the saturated center of the sandwich. Laissez les bon temps rouler! (And by les bon temps, we mean les blunts.)
Cherry Valley Deli, Whitestone, NY (second location in West Hempstead, NY, near Hofstra University)
Tucked in the Whitestone Village neighborhood of Queens is one of the best examples of why there’s still Outer-Borough pride in NYC: Cherry V. Open 24-hours, this corner store/deli/grill is where to head after getting blunted down by the shore of the East River or after a rager at the Greek-owned clubs in Astoria. Sandwiches like the Bushman (fried chicken cutlet, melted American cheese, crispy bacon and brown gravy on a toasted garlic hero) and the Beast (fried chicken cutlet, melted Swiss, bacon, brown gravy and onion rings on a toasted garlic hero) are legendary in this part of the world, but the HIGH TIMES favorite has got to be the Lean Boy: thinly sliced maple-honey turkey, melted mozzarella, caramelized onions and brown gravy on, you guessed it, a toasted garlic hero. Complement it with a “Waffle Couch,” a.k.a. waffle fries with melted mutz and more of that delightful gravy.
Kitt’s Kornbread, Jefferson, TX
Jefferson may be smack dab in the middle of Nowheresville, but this spot makes the list because it serves up some serious stoner snacks: Corn bread, excuse us, kornbread sandwiches. Kitt’s has perfected their recipe so the corn bread doesn’t crumble into bits when you’re devouring it, and they have a bunch of interesting, homemade sides -- like chicken and dumplings, broccoli salad, and frito pie -- to round out any meal. Try the fried bologna and American kornbread sandwich to be extra patriotic, and bring home a coconut buttermilk pie or turtle cheesecake so you can quickly cure your next bout with munchies.
Pickle’s Deli - Clinton, Washington
Found on Whidbey Island in the Puget Sound, Pickle’s Deli has won numerous local awards for its sandwiches and is proud to use local ingredients for nearly everything they make. Stoners who want to do their own thing can happily customize a sandwich with over 50 toppings to choose from, while those who prefer to pick from a list of pre-designed edibles can opt for creations like The Smokey Beast, featuring rosemary diamante bread piled with Italian roast beef, smoked gouda, caramelized onions, romaine, tomato, and a healthy shmear of blue cheese-horseradish sauce. HIGH TIMES also recommends the Mary Jane, a soft garlic tortilla filled with hummus, tzatziki, oven-roasted turkey, feta, sun-dried tomatoes, artichoke hearts, roasted red peppers, pepperoncinis and mixed greens that’s fired up in a panini press.
Ike’s Place - San Francisco, CA
All the pleasantly medicated folks roaming San Fran flock to Ike’s Place for their notorious, convention-killing combinations. “The Count of Monte Chase-O” is one of our faves, with its sweet-and-savory blend of ham, strawberry preserves, Swiss and turkey, as is the “Super Mario,” stuffed with all-beef meatballs, marinara and mozzarella sticks. The “Peg Bundy” is perfect for people with cravings similar to a pregnant woman, filled with avocado, breaded eggplant, French dressing and gouda, while the “Heath Ledger” (rest in peace, ole chap) pays homage to the late thespian with its dramatic mix of beer-battered zucchini, Ike’s red pesto, ranch and vegan meatballs.
Are any of these spots where you go to ward off munchies? Or, have we left your favorite stoner sandwich shop off the list? Let us know in the comments below!