There’s a good reason everyone is obsessed with their pet; animals are the absolute best. It’s universal law that they’re far superior to humans. Can you imagine what assholes we’d all be if we didn’t have puppy or cats to go home to after a full day of dealing with other people? This holiday season, let’s show these furry dorks how much we love them, with stoner gifts for pets!
1. Catnip Marijuana Leaf and Joint Toys – $15
I can’t tell you to blow smoke in your cat Willie’s ears. I can, however, fully-endorse cat nip. Mother Earth grows feel-good herbs for all the coolest species! Rather than get Willie another mouse-shaped catnip toy from Petco, try these joint and weed leaf-shaped toys. Light up your joint and watch Tom Cat play with his.
2. Marijuana Cat Bandana – $4.52
Now that Sparkles the kitty is feeling good, she deserves something cool to wear so she can look good too. A French babe hand makes these marijuana cat bandanas.
3. Marijuana Dog Leaf Collar – $18
Don’t worry, the cat lady writing this didn’t get too stoned and forget about pups, too. With this homemade marijuana leaf dog collar, Clover can show all the other dogs at the dog park that he’s totally pro-legalization.
4. Bernie Sanders 2016 Dog Tee – $23.10
You’re right. Your pup is far more politically-minded than that goof ball Clover running around in his weed leaf collar. Let Tito the pup declare his support for Sander’s bill to end federal prohibition with this Bern Baby Bern doggy tee.
5. The Kitty Cat Yoga Mat with Infused Catnip – $30
How cute is it when pets get all up in your grill while you’re trying to do yoga? I think they get excited because we look like animals. Now Bruna can have her own mat to practice down dog—and get a nice buzz on too! Everyone loves stoned yoga.
6. Dog Toy Pepperoni Pizza – $16.99
Pizza, pizza, pizza! If we’re giving Gator all these weed-themed toys, it only seems fair to throw in some pizza as well.
7. Gato Ganja – $20
Some kitties like snazzy new light-up catnip toys. But Mr. Muffins is old school. Show Mr. Muffins how much you love him with a half ounce order of potent, Oregon-grown Gato Ganja.
8. Pot Leaf Dog or Cat Pet ID Tag – $6
It’s no biggie if you get too high and lose your lighter, but there’s nothing worse than losing your pet. With these pot leaf pet IDs (on sale!), everyone will know how to get Toby back to you should the stoner’s worst nightmare come true.
9. 200 Pink Cheshire Cat Mini Ziploc Bags – $8
Uh oh! Meekie Cat got a great deal on a shipment of bulk catnip, but she can’t smoke it all herself. Now Meekie can sell some to her friends with these pink Cheshire Cat mini Ziploc baggies.
10. Water Garden – $60
Don’t have a pet? Give a fish a forever home and treat yourself this holiday season with this double decker garden/fish bowl. In this symbiotic ecosystem, Tsunami the fish can help nutrients reach the greens and vice versa. What seeds you plant up top are up to you.