Fight the Power in Style: What Every Protester Needs

By
Sophie Saint Thomas

The right to peacefully assemble is promised in the Constitution as part of the First Amendment. While cannabis activists had many reasons to celebrate the recent election, with legal weed passing in California, Maine, Massachusetts, and Nevada, the sad fact is that, for non-evil citizens everywhere, there will be a lot to protest in the weeks and months ahead. We understand that you want to get out there and exercise that right, so we’ve created this list to help you get prepared. High Times hates to tell you to leave your weed at home more than anything, but since the cops will be looking for any excuse to arrest protesters, eating an edible beforehand—especially in non-legal states—is the safest way to enjoy your medicine and not go to jail.

Here’s your first tip: Should you get arrested, shout your name at the top of your lungs. Your fellow advocates will hear, shout back and make sure your loved ones know where you are. Fight the power!

  1. Tec Down Ear Warmers

Unless you’re protesting in sunny Los Angeles, where you’re also likely to be enjoying a legal buzz, it’s going to be cold out there. In particular, anyone traveling to Washington, DC, to protest Trumpland will need these babies to keep their ears warm. Yet the ears of those marching can use protection from more than just the chill. While we’ve all heard about the gnarly burning caused by getting pepper spray in your eyes, that shit hurts anywhere near your ears as well. Please go tell Mike Pence to stay out of my uterus, but safety first!

  1. Made-in-the-USA Jungmaven Hemp Bandana

In addition to concealing your identity should you not want your face getting plastered on the news or caught by surveillance cameras (which are everywhere these days), wearing a bandana over your face will protect you if tear gas is used. Unless it’s very cold where you live, soak it in water first to breathe through easier. Any bandana will do, but compared to synthetic fibers, hemp is eco-friendlier and easier to breathe through. Stick this in your pocket, then put it on when you’re ready to remind politicians that Love Trumps Hate.

  1. Pacon Peacock 100% Recycled Railroad Board

With so many chants and messages of protest, how can you pick just one? From “Black Lives Matter” to “Pussy Grabs Back” to “Say It Loud, Say It Clear, Immigrants Are Welcome Here!,” you’ll need some nice recycled paper to share your message on. Throw a few Sharpies in your back pocket and you’ll have everything you need to express yourself at your peaceful assembly.

  1. Neat Cheeks Natural Wipes

Did you know that some nasty people like to spit on protesters? If anyone has cooties, it’s the type of person who would hock a loogie on someone exercising their right to protest. Wipe that shit away with these… just don’t litter!

  1. All Good Coconut Sunstick

 

Whether it’s protesting Trump, police murders or the Dakota Access Pipeline, we’ve got a long road ahead of us. Don’t make the mistake of forgetting sunscreen and getting burned so badly that you can’t come back out the next day for more! Made with organic coconut, this sunstick fits right in your pocket, is easy to reapply, and will keep your pretty face safe from the sun and ready for more action. Remember, it doesn’t matter if it’s winter—if it’s sunny out, you can burn!

  1. Manitoba Harvest Hemp Heart Bar (Chocolate)

 

You can’t fight the powers that be on an empty stomach! Stash a few of these in your bag for delicious and nutritious on-the-go energy. Pair this hemp chocolate snack with a small carton of milk—not just because the two go together, but because milk is great for flushing the tear gas out of your eyes should things turn ugly.

  1. CamelBak Hydration Backpack

Save the milk for your tear-gassed eyeballs; water is best for hydration. Above all else, you can’t protest if you’re not hydrated. Dehydration can lead to dizziness, weakness, confusion and even death—pretty much everything you don’t want to happen at a protest. So strap on one of these puppies and march on, friend!

  1. Flux Portable Phone Charger

On the day of a protest, it’s impossible to know how many people will arrive, how the cops will react, or how crazy things will get in the streets. It’s crucial to stay in touch with the friends you came with, as well as be able to alert emergency contacts should you get arrested—and since a march can easily become a 12-hour event, you’ll need to recharge your phone. The Flux phone charger is portable, lightweight, and easy to carry, and it’s capable of recharging your phone’s battery twice (plus it works on both iPhones and Androids). Along with keeping your friends on speed dial, enter the number for the National Lawyers Guild just in case you get arrested.

  1. Midland GXT1000VP4 36-Mile, 50-Channel FRS/GMRS Two-Way Radio (Pair)

It’s easy enough for your phone to get broken, stolen or lost while you’re simply walking to the bus stop; a rowdy protest is a whole other ballgame. Communication is vital, so if you’re separated from your phone—or should the government, the Illuminati or some evil corporation pull a service blackout—that’s when walkie-talkies come in handy.

  1. HotHands Toe Warmers

It’s damn near impossible to do anything—let alone lead the crowd in a “Tell me what democracy looks like / This is what democracy looks like!” chant—if you can’t feel your toes. For any protest, march or demonstration, it’s vital to wear comfy closed-toed shoes (I love canvas Doc Martens). If you’re going to be somewhere cold, the closed-toed shoe becomes irrelevant if you have to go home due to the fear of impending frostbite. Also useful for hands stuck inside gloves, these toe warmers are made in the USA and last a full eight hours.

Sophie Saint Thomas

By
Sophie Saint Thomas

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