Categories: Culture

Texas Police Blame Bigfoot for Inability to Bust Illegal Pot Farmers

Texas law enforcement agencies are now blaming Bigfoot for their inability to track down the culprits behind an illegal marijuana cultivation site in the northeast portion of the state.

Over the weekend, a shakedown crew involving several members of the Delta County Sheriff’s Office, a handful of game wardens and officers with the Department of Public Safety acted on a tip they received from a group of local hog wranglers that suggested a “substantial marijuana field” was being maintained deep inside a Wildlife Management Area about an hour outside of Dallas.

Together, armed with a pack of dope-sniffing hounds and aerial support, the drug warriors stormed the forest where they eventually came across an acre plot with around 6,550 mature cannabis plants growing in all their glory—some reaching 10 feet tall.

Delta County Sheriff Ricky Smith told reporters that the crop, which was estimated to have a value of around $6 million, was “the largest discovery of marijuana found” in his career.

The group of investigators believe that that the suspects responsible for this operation are of American descent and not a wild gang of Mexicans sent across the border by a cartel.

“We were told the suspects spoke English and communicated well,” Smith said.

Although the Texas fuzz claims they were hot on the trail of the pot growing perpetrators, their mission was ultimately foiled when they encountered a group of Bigfoot hunters scouring the woods in hopes of snapping a few photos of the beastly folk legend known as Sasquatch.

According to NPR, the illegal cultivation operation had been there since around May. The growers had a fully equipped campsite—complete with generators, watering systems and camouflaging materials.

Fortunately, while it is a shame that an acre of perfectly good weed is in the process of being snuffed out by the prohibitionary orders of the state of Texas, the pot growers evaded some serious prison time by dodging out on the operation before authorities arrived. A pot haul of this magnitude can easily get a person locked up in the Lone Star State for around 99 years on the possession charges alone, according to NORML.

There has been no word whether Texas police suspect Bigfoot to be part of the operation.

Mike Adams

Mike Adams is a High Times Staff writer hailing from the darkest depths of the Armpit of America—Southern Indiana.

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