11 Chores To Do While Stoned

1. Raking leaves

Your rewarding autumn harvest. Puff, puff, pass and rake, rake, crash.

2. Mopping

Mopping the floor sucks. Smoke and it will be more fun. Promise.

3. Organizing your closet

With a sweet sativa, this could be your sartorial reality.

4. Mowing the lawn

The pattern possibilities are endless when you mow with Mary Jane.

5. Vacuuming

Toke up and feel like you’re solving all your the world’s problems when you make your house sparkle!

6. Scrubbing tile grout

A bong rip, and then turn something gross into A MISSION.

7. Setting the table

Attention to detail is easy when you’re baked; your table will never look better.

8. Unclogging a drain

Nothing’s as satisfying as unclogging your brain — and then that drain.

9. Shoveling snow

So much easier when you’re stoned. That is all.

10. Paying bills

If only we could all see PAID on our billing statements. Being high makes bureaucratic nonsense a little less painful.

11. Walking the dog

If you’re stoned-smart, you can make that dog walk your ass.

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  1. for the year and a half since I got my dog, I have been making pot brownies and eating them in the evening. MOST of the evening time when I am higher than giraffe balls I am sitting with, playing with, otherwise enjoying my dog.

    I apologize for the damage this has done to the national security of these United States.

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