We all know that stoners come in all shapes and sizes. From hippies to fashionisas, pretty much everyone loves ganja. But as far as categories of stoners go, I'll admit that I probably fall into that of "Sto-nerd." My extremely deep Harry Potter obsession, my collection of of Star Wars toys and my last few Halloween costumes (Margot Tenenbaum, Lumpy Space Princess, Hansel from Zoolander) attest to that—which is why this gift guide could also be interpreted as my personal Christmas wish list (just throwing that out there, Mom).
Basically, if you're looking for a holiday gift to give your stoner friend who loves comics, cartoons, science, reading, video games—or basically anything fun—then you've come to the right place. Warning: Not responsible for you "accidentally" gifting all of these cool things to yourself.
1. Pokemon Pokeball Metal Herb Grinder – $26.90
It would be negligent of me not to quote the product description here: "I wanna grind the very best, Like no one ever has. To roll them is my real quest, To smoke them is my cause. I will travel across the land, Smoking far and wide. Each ~herb~ to understand, The power that's inside. POKEMON, GOTTA SMOKE EM ALLLLLL." Get this for your friend who wishes those were the real words to the theme song.
2. Rubik's Safe – $15.35
Your sto-nerd friends probably already have some of these laying around, which makes this the best way for them to hide their stashes in plain sight.
3. Handmade Glass X-Wing Pipe – $90
Even those of us who have chosen the Dark Side can get behind this awesome piece of glass (just don't tell the Imperial Forces I said so). You're friend who has tickets to the midnight premiere of "The Force Awakens" will be overjoyed by this gift, assuming J.J. Abrams pulls through and we don't have another "Phantom Menace" on our hands.
4. Augmented Reality Aliens Attack Game – $35
Augmented reality is the new rage in the world of gaming, and this device syncs with a smartphone, allowing the player to battle aliens alone or with a friend. This is the high-tech gift to give your fun-loving stoner friend who'll share a bowl with you while y'all duke it out against E.T.
5. THC Molecule Necklace – $18
Chemistry nerds will adore this necklace, but let's be real, any stoners would love some smart-ass, THC bling. It's a subtle way of showing off your love of pot without a giant pot leaf in your face.
6. "Jay & Silent Spongebob" Pin Set – $29.99
Kevin Smith. Spongebob. Hat pins. Have we hit the nerdy stoner trifecta here, or what?! I dare you to find a sto-nerd who wouldn't appreciate this holiday gift.
7. Spaced: The Complete Series – $69.95
Okay, so full disclosure: I have yet to watch this BBC cult classic, so I can't speak to it personally, but it has been on my "Must Watch" list for a while. Described as a "a cross between The Simpsons, The X-Files and Northern Exposure," the show revolves around an "immature skateboarding would-be comic artist," his "moody, responsibility-shy" roommate, their "oddball assortment of friends" and their collective "self-induced lack of success in employment, relationships and life in general." They also smoke a lot of weed. Tracie Egan Morrissey included it on a 2012 stoner gift guide for Jezebel, and that's honestly good enough for me.
8. "Mushroom Kingdom" Themed Mini Rig – $179
Nintendo fans will freak out over this incredible piece. Sure, at $179, it's not the cheapest gift on this list, but can you think of a cooler way to take a dab? Your friend will love you forever.
9. Dancing Water Speakers – $23.99
Are these speakers today's version of the lava lamp? That's what they look like to me. Any type of sto-nerd would be thrilled to receive this groovy combo of light and sound. Plus, everyone always needs new speakers, making this a major gift-giving win.
10. Custom Simpsons Bic Lighters – $15
D'oh! Why didn't we think of it before? A Simpsons lighter is the perfect accessory for pretty much any stoner—but especially for the cartoon lovers and pop culture aficionados out there. Get this for your friend who's TV is permanently set to Adult Swim.
11. Astronaut Weed Rolling Tray – $25
Again, another gift that non-sto-nerd stoners would also love. This astronaut rolling tray is trippy, cool and basically a piece of art. If your friend spends more time rolling joints than not, then make sure they have something awesome to look at while they roll all that weed.
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