Although the hallucinogenic drug psilocybin, more commonly referred to as Magic Mushrooms, is not the kind of hard-hitting substance that can infiltrate a person like a pack of soul-sucking kittens with the mystical power to drain every last breath out of their body until they are dead, the mind-bending effects of this sometimes spiritually haunting fungus has been know to fuck some people up from time to time.
It is the first timers that often experience the most trouble: they start out feeling somewhere between slightly nauseous to standing over the toilet in a drooling stupor waiting for some kind of monster to come crawling out of their guts. Then the room comes alive and they start sweat…everyone looks insane. The only solace for these poor, panicking bastards is that the trip will not last forever. But then it does, or at least that’s how it seems when the mind is hell bent on performing some scary shit for the next 12 hours.
It’s only after the user has set sail on a few psychedelic expeditions inside the belly of the beast that he or she learns to cope with the countless hours of paranoia and chest clenching fear that has a tendency to teeter on a person’s spine and gnaw at the psyche like bone.
But no matter how intense a psilocybin trip gets for someone in your immediate circle, it is never wise to do what a Washington couple did recently after a trip into the magic land of reflection and horror got a little bit too hard to handle for the man of the house.
Man, I’m Really Freaking Out Over Here
A report from NBC affiliate KHQ indicates that a Cheney woman had become concerned that her husband was on the verge of suffering a deadly overdose after consuming some homegrown magic mushrooms. That’s when she called 911 in hopes that summoning the police, the fire department and an ambulance would somehow save him from being pulled straight into hell on his last functioning brain cell. She told the emergency dispatcher that her husband was “freaking out” on the shrooms he had grown in his toilet and was starting to worry about making it out alive.
Although the report does not give any indication as to what happened before the cops showed up, we suspect the man may have torn off all of his clothes and ran into the backyard searching for a trap door back to reality. But when he failed to find the kill switch, his anxieties tore through the pores on his skin like a pack of electric cockroaches and sent him into a downward spiral that we must admit to being somewhat disappointed to have missed.
Wife Admits Husband Was Growing Toilet Shrooms
When officers arrived on the scene, they found the woman standing outside searching for her tripped-out husband. This is when she apparently confessed that her husband, who was out there running around in an open field somewhere trying to catch up with his mind, may have clipped out an old ad from High Times Magazine and was now growing magic mushrooms in various parts of their home, including the toilet.
The woman went on to explain that her husband recently consumed some tea he had brewed with the shrooms for quality control purposes, but the drugs eventually got on top of him and sent him hurtling down a Technicolor corridor of panic and sheer terror.
So, the cops set out on foot to try to find the man. When they finally tracked him down, he was mumbling something about “freaking out” and wanting to hurt someone.
Back at the house, the man came clean with the officers and confessed to growing psilocybin inside the home. A search of the premises uncovered “mushrooms growing everywhere,” including “in the toilet, and on the floor near the toilet,” according to KHQ.
The man was then loaded into an ambulance and hauled off to a local hospital for treatment and perhaps even a psychological evaluation. So far, police have not charged the couple with a crime. But it is conceivable that they both could be prosecuted for manufacturing a controlled substance. That’s just one reason a bad trip on magic mushrooms is no reason to call the cops.
Final Hit: Never Call the Police for Shroom Overdose
Sure, the drug can be intense sometimes, but it is next to impossible to die from ingesting these psychedelic delicacies. A recent Global Drug Survey found that magic mushrooms are some of the safest drugs in the world. A so-called overdose from magic mushrooms is really just treated as “mushroom toxicity” if a flipped-out patient ends up in the emergency room. The drug is flushed out of a patient’s system with liquid charcoal. However, an actual overdose of shrooms is extremely rare. So just chill out and enjoy the ride.
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