University of Weed: College Students Get Stoned More Now Than Ever Before

There are more college students majoring in the stoner arts these days than ever before, according to a new study. Researchers from the University of Michigan in conjunction with the lifestyles survey, Monitoring the Future made the recent and slightly obvious discovery that college kids are using marijuana more now than they have in the past three decades.

Indeed, the majority of academia is reveling in a smokescreen of higher learning, with 51 percent of those attending college reporting getting ripped up, chiefed out, or stoned to the bone on marijuana at least once in their in their lives. Researchers say this is a significant increase from the weed-friendly student body of 2006, when only 34 percent reported an experience with the leaf.

“This is the highest rate of daily use observed among college students since 1981 — a third of a century ago,” said lead investigator, Lloyd Johnston. “In other words, one in every 20 college students was smoking pot on a daily or near-daily basis in 2013, including one in every 11 males and one in every 34 females. To put this into a longer-term perspective, from 1990 to 1994, fewer than one in 50 college students used marijuana that frequently.”

Interestingly, this study was paid for out of Uncle Sam’s pot propaganda fund, which is overseen by the National Institute on Drug Abuse and serves to paint a dark portrait of the supposed doped out existence of the youth of America. However, the good news is while marijuana has been the most commonly consumed illegal drug for well over thirty years, the only death and destruction to come crashing down as a result has been brought on by administrators of the drug war. Thanks, fellas!

The report also indicates that pharmaceutical speed continues to build a loyal following among college students. The use of amphetamines, like Adderall and Ritalin, is the second most commonly used substance on campus, with 11 percent of the college population admitting to popping prescription crank without a doctors consent. “We’re seeing an increase among college students with the use of stimulant drugs, particularly for the ones used to treat ADHD,” said Johnson. “(College students) are using it to help them to study.”

The third most widely used drug is a trinity of recreational influence: five percent of college students report using ecstasy, hallucinogens or prescription painkillers in the past year.

Contrary to previous studies that have deemed prescription opiate abuse one of the most prominent serial killers in American history, the latest survey from the University of Michigan claims this so called “epidemic” is on the decline — at least where college students are concerned. In 2006, the survey found that nearly 9 percent were using narcotics, like Vicodin and OxyContin, but that number tapered off to 5.4 percent in 2012, where it currently remains.

Although the latest survey indicates an insignificant drop in alcohol use among college students, a hefty 63 percent reported consuming booze within the past month — down from 69 percent in 2008. Yet, the majority of college students — 76 percent — report the consumption of alcohol within the past 12 months, with nearly 60 percent admitting to at least one drunken episode during that time.