Tennessee Drug Dealer Begs Police to Find Man Who Stole An Ounce of Weed

bud in bag
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It is safe to say that the illegal drug trade is a savage and competitive underworld full of two kinds of people: those who have the intelligence and natural instinct to thwart law enforcement at every turn in order to maintain profitability and those mental midgets who could not even sell a dime bag to themselves without spending some time in jail.

The following story is a bizarre account of the latter.

It seems a Tennessee pot dealer, whose name is being kept anonymous for obvious reasons, was ripped off the other night in Clarksville after one of his clients suggested a gun was pointed in his general direction, threatening to pull the trigger if there was any attempt at retaliation. Rather than risk having his head blown off, the dealer simply threw his hands up and allowed the pesky thug to make a getaway with the weed.

But this level of underhandedness did not settle well with the small time trafficker, who likely needs every penny of his parking lot proceeds to keep his illicit marijuana business afloat. So he conjured up what he believed to be a brilliant scheme to get his revenge on the villainous bud burglar—he called 911 and summoned the local police for help.

According to report from WZTV, the cops were called out to the scene of the pilferage earlier last week to investigate the drug dealer’s complaint over how he got rolled for $200 worth of green dope. The man told the officers that he was trying to conduct a friendly, back alley street deal for a small amount of marijuana when his buyer flipped out and started using lead-infused intimidation tactics to get him to cough up a complimentary ounce.

Of course, the investigating officers were somewhat taken back by the dealer’s candor.

After all, its not everyday a lawless member of black market commerce reaches out to the cops in hopes of taking down a double crosser. Especially without any regard, or even a second thought, about the possibility that it might be he who is dragged to jail while the real criminal is left behind with his freedom and a handful of gratis smoke.

“Everybody told him not to report it, but he really wanted the police to know that he was robbed. Now we know,” said Officer Darren Koski with the Clarksville Police Department.

Although the cops understood it was highly unlikely that they would be able to track down the hooligan, even with the pot peddler’s dead eyed description of the suspect—black male, 5-foot-8, in a blue hoodie and dark jeans—they circled the neighborhood anyway in hopes of making an arrest. But no one fitting the description could be found.

After an incident report was filed, the dealer began asking police questions about what kind of savage wrath the courts would have on such a roughneck fiend for disrupting his business affairs. He said he either needed the weed or the money in order to continue supporting his pregnant girlfriend.

“He asked me what would happen in court if the thief is caught. I explained that I really doubt they will give him back $200 worth of marijuana,” Koski said.

Fortunately, it does not appear the pot pusher encountered any immediate trouble with police. But we are almost certain that the boys in blue will be watching him very closely in the future, ready to stomp on his neck for being dumb enough to continue slinging weed in Tennessee.

You can keep up with all of HIGH TIMES’ marijuana news right here.

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