Thanksgiving Guest Murdered For Not Sharing Crack Cocaine

We just heard about a Thanksgiving guest murdered for not sharing crack cocaine. We’re sure you’re just as curious as we were. Here’s what went down.
Thanksgiving Guest Murdered for Not Sharing Crack Cocaine

A report about a Thanksgiving guest murdered for not sharing crack cocaine has caught our attention. We know that getting together with friends and family over the Thanksgiving holiday can be murder. We can sympathize with that—especially, if one of the guests is holding some of the good shit and does not spread the wealth with the rest of folks at the table. Wait, what?

Being Neighborly: Not All It’s Cracked Up To Be

Thanksgiving Guest Murdered for Not Sharing Crack Cocaine

A Thanksgiving gathering in Minnesota took a turn for the ultra-violent last week after a guest fired up a crack pipe at the dinner table without offering to share with the host.

A report from the Star Tribune indicates that 47-year-old Anenia Marie Hare took issue with the fact that someone preparing to tear into her turkey and all the fixins’ had the nerve to get spun out of his mind in plain sight.

All without at least giving her a courtesy hit.

The Thanksgiving guest murdered for not sharing crack cocaine was 69-year-old Edward Caliph. He had nowhere to go this year to pay tribute to the Plymouth colonists and Wampanoag Indians sharing a feast together during the fall of 1621.

So, Hare, trying to be a good neighbor, invited Caliph over to her house to break bread in a celebratory fashion just like Abraham Lincoln intended when he created the official Thanksgiving holiday.

If the story were to end here, our hearts would be content and full of bliss knowing that neighborhood camaraderie is still alive and well.

But that’s simply not the case.


Thanksgiving Guest Murdered for Not Sharing Crack Cocaine

As Hare set the dinner table, Caliph, giving no consideration to his surroundings, whipped out a crack pipe and began getting sideways on plumes of the drug before anyone in the room had the chance to say the blessing.

This got under the skin of Hare. Not because the man was at the table enjoying crack cocaine as an appetizer, but because he did not first ask for permission—and failed to offer the drug to anyone else.

That’s when Hare erupted into a psycho frenzy.

A report from the Hennepin County Attorney’s Office shows that she grabbed a TV antenna and a butcher knife in an attempt to intimidate Caliph. This vulgar display of Thanksgiving aggression scared the holy living hell out of him. He got up from his seat at the table and politely tried to remove himself before she stabbed him.

But he wasn’t getting off that easy, not if Hare had anything to do with it.

It was at this point that she bolted to the front of the apartment and blocked the door. In her hands, she was still gripping the antenna and knife in an “attempt to be dominating,” the report reads.

Apparently, this wild-eyed raucous convinced Caliph that his life was in danger, which prompted him to start screaming for “help” in hopes that a neighbor would call 911.

But not a soul came to his rescue.

Feeling as though his time was running out, Caliph picked up a vacuum cleaner and tossed it through a window in order to make a daring escape. But Hare was still not prepared to throw in the towel. She grabbed hold of his body to keep him from climbing out of the window to safety, causing him to lose his balance and fall on top of her.

On the floor, the two began to struggle for control of the knife.

Yet, Hare eventually gained the upper hand. The report shows that after rolling around on the floor for a while, Caliph, “started snoring.”

But she had not stabbed him.

Hare later told the emergency dispatcher, “I put his ass to sleep… I just felt like I put him in a sleeper hold or something.”

Final Hit: Thanksgiving Guest Murdered For Not Sharing Crack Cocaine

Unfortunately, the incident did not end with a happy holiday.

Caliph was pronounced dead at the hospital due to “homicidal violence,” which led to Hare being arrested and charged with second-degree murder without intent. She could be spending next Thanksgiving in prison.

Let this Thanksgiving guest murdered for not sharing crack cocaine be a lesson to all of us. The next time you think about partaking in feel-good substances at the dinner table, be sure to bring enough to share. After all, if you don’t, you could end up in the same fowl shape as the turkey.

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