The HIGH TIMES weekly astrological forecast, complete with strain recommendations!
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ARIES
For our international readers who might not know, North America struggled this past week with the daylight savings time switcheroo, and asked the yearly question: ‘why the hell do we still do this?’ to everyone in general but no one in particular. Some think this antiquated notion originated with farmers having trouble getting the cows to give milk in the dark, others believe the government is just too lazy to fix it. It seems bizarre that we allow such a dramatic event to happen twice a year, yet the layperson doesn’t really know why. I am likening this to how you respond to reoccurring events in your life. You need to reevaluate the raison d’être for a lot of your go-to reactions. Give them some thought, really question why you behave the way you do. If not, the winter darkness won’t be the only thing getting you down this month. Strain recommendation: Super Sour Diesel
TAURUS
Your new relationship needs more than the usual amount of adjustments and compromise. Like dating a celebrity, you have little claim on their time. You’d never want to get in the way of their career, nor could you really, but it would be nice to feel like the priority from time to time. Direct appeals leave your partner feeling guilty, which just pressurizes the moments you do have together. You have three options as I see it: you end it before it gets too painful, you work on your needs, or you make your passion as demanding upon your psyche as theirs is on them. Strain recommendation: ACDC
CANCER
A Cancerian I met recently described his sign as being emotional and avoidant. Flipping through my mental look book of Cancers friends, I was struck by how true this statement is. While I recognize the depth to which you feel things, I am never quite sure how to talk to you about it. You seem to want to relate emotionally yet are so private and unwilling to demonstrate vulnerability. It is the curse of your sign, to want what you feel compelled to reject. I challenge you to break down the wall this week: you don’t need to let the flood gates open, but if you chose one special person to receive your inside goo, they will feel honored and your bond will strengthen. By the way, this person must be someone you are already close to; telling some rando on the street that you are sad doesn’t count! Strain recommendation: Blackberry Kush
GEMINI
Pivot to the left, deke to the right; ‘this monkey is an expert feces chucker’ you think as you dive to the floor. ‘These calisthenics must be toning my legs nicely, and at least he’s a cute kind of monkey, not those horrible red-arsed orangutans’. Haven’t you noticed yet my dear, that aside from all the bright sides, you are being pelleted with poop? How many times do you need to slip in it before you storm the little shit-flinger? You are 5 times his size at least, if you just accept a hit or two you can make this end. If not, you are in for weeks more of dodging; remember, monkeys don’t tire easily. Strain recommendation: Tangerine Dream
LEO
A gorgeous light glows ahead. Your team is walking the wooded path, but internal strife is slowing you down. Instead of running towards the beauty, you are arguing about how to get there, what logs you should rest upon, and what song to sing on the way. Compromise can be difficult for Leos, control is beastie you navigate often. The cosmos are begging you not to lose sight of the goal. Sometimes you don’t use your voice until it comes out as a yell. Work on communication and try to remember to breathe deeply and count to ten when others struggle with it as well. Strain recommendation: Jean Guy
VIRGO
You may find yourself uttering the words “you think you know someone…” in this coming week. It’s unsettling to discover that what you expected of someone was wrong. You feel duped and vulnerable, as if they have been hiding their true selves for your entire relationship. Is there a chance however, that the misstep here was with your assumptions, or even with the very notion of presuming we know anyone deeply enough to accurately predict their behavior at all times? The arrogance and naiveté of that kind of belief is astounding if you really think about it. So pack up your shock and fear, and try seeing the people in your life with fresh eyes and no preconceptions: you might be in for even more surprises and unexpected joys. Strain recommendation: Candy Jack
LIBRA
When your favorite show ‘jumps the shark’ the disappointment can be palpable. You’ve followed it for six years, sympathized with the characters, given it an hour of your life every week for a few months at a time, looked forward to it, talked about it with your friends, even worried about some of your favorites getting out of the next episode alive. Friendships are susceptible to a similar kind of let down once it’s initial shine has dulled. If the substance of your connection isn’t deeper than the fun times you’ve had together it will fade like the popularity of a show that’s continued beyond its natural expiration date. Sometimes you just have to let go. There is no sadder TV scenario than desperately watching a bad show you used to love out of some misplaced sense of loyalty. Strain recommendation: Jawa Pie
SCORPIO
Promises made long ago are coming back to haunt you. You don’t really give a tiny rat’s ass about any of it anymore, but your sense of obligation is nagging you. You could make excuses and bow out gracefully, but that part of you that doesn’t want to let yourself down is tenacious. Its happened a few too many times recently and it doesn’t feel good. No one else has been drastically affected yet but you know the truth and that’s enough. How can you expect others to rise to your high standards if you don’t hold to them yourself? So off you trundle to the obligation, feeling victimized by your past choices. At least take some pride in the fact that you still care enough about your own self-opinion to do this kind of crap. Most of us gave up on ourselves ages ago. Strain recommendation: Cotton Candy Kush
SAGITTARIUS
Between the World Series of Baseball and the American elections, I’m going to wager that a lot of good luck talismans were dusted off last week. The thing about fortune is that it usually lasts as long as you believe in it. Once anyone invested in the situation loses faith or jinxes it, the whole thing crumbles like a house of cards. I was a draft oracle this year, advising picks based only on a player’s name feel. We were doing very well until the team leader boasted about my skills to a friend. I felt hexed. Since then, we dropped six places and I have googled ‘how to unjinx myself” numerous times. Faith in luck, or in yourself, is what you make of it. You can manifest a lot with will and an open heart. I ask you to avail yourself to the power of you this week. Strain recommendation: Fire OG
CAPRICORN
Before entering the salon you planned on asking for some basic upkeep, maintenance of your previous look, but upon meeting the shop dog you decide you want to look just like him. A beautiful beige and golden lab, with a soft white tummy and eyes of deep brown. His name is Boy, and you have decided to be Girl, his human counterpart. Appropriating animals is quite common; we get tattoos of them, frame pictures of them, dress ourselves in their furs and stuff their bodies for decoration (though I wouldn’t chose to admire them this way). What do we yearn for that they possess? The cosmos are suggesting that you will do well to connect to some animal friends this week, to find out what they have that you need. It could be that they live in the moment, that they don’t take more than they need, or that once they decide to love you it’s unconditional. Strain recommendation: Purple Urkle
AQUARIUS
Something has shifted towards the positive; a weight has been lifted from your psyche. A path revealed itself, under the pile of colorful fallen leaves, which has brought hope and ambition back into your chest. Not all of your problems have been solved, but since an achievable goal was chosen, you’ve found comfort knowing what to do next. So how ready are you for your world to flip upside down again? It’s taken you a while to get to this moment of calm; can you handle a disruption so soon? If not, maybe you should tell your partner in crime. Strain recommendation: Burmese Kush
PISCES
All the art you’ve encountered these last few months has reflected your inner life. While it’s beautiful to observe the universe taking an interest in little old you, it’s time to switch things up a bit. You haven’t necessarily learnt everything you can from what you’ve been shown. So instead of watching this cosmic instructional video again and again, it’s time for you to make the art that reflect you. Take brush in hand and let your instincts guide you. Have a classic film moment where you stand back from a massive blank canvas admiring it’s expansiveness before picking up a thick brush coated in color and slapping it down with passion. The montage plays until you fall back in relief as your masterpiece unfolds all the deep secrets even you didn’t know about. Strain recommendation: Space Queen
