“Sun is shining, the weather is sweet, yeah…”
I feel like a broken record here, but it’s like every time I look up now it’s time for another Cop List. I don’t know where the time goes. I’ve been hard at work over here on this year’s Art issue for our print side, so forgive me that I’m once again a bit late, but let’s call it drug dealer time, eh? You’re going to be stoked when you see the mag.
Anyway! Between rising temps, shrinking clothing, and a serious spike in recreational activities to partake in, it’s really starting to feel like summer’s here, and we ain’t letting no silly viruses get us down this year. It feels like it’s been so long since we’ve had that laissez faire attitude… Remember summer vacations? Boy do I miss those days. Vacations in general. Time away from the computer, no responsibilities. Time to play. Fuck, being old sucks. I miss playtime. I know kids aren’t allowed to read this but if any of y’all managed to slip through our incredibly intense security, hear this: never grow up! It’s no fun over here. Geoffrey was right after all.
Oh well, in the spirit of summertime, and the fun we used to have, I decided to put together a few staples for a day out at the beach, or on the water. Sure it’s sandy over there, but you gotta leave the house sometime. I guess it’s time to shave the beard, huh?
As always, feel free to shout at me on twitter if I forgot to mention your favorite product, or feel free to absolutely demand something be on the next one. Those are the funniest conversations I have with readers. Enjoy!
Life is not Grape
If you’re a regular on this list, you likely read my picks earlier this year when I declared Candypaint one of my favorite up & comers. Well friends, some shit’s gone down, and it’s important we set the record straight here. Although he probably doesn’t want me using his name, Candypaint was originally the brainchild of one very dialed cultivator, Kiyan, and a fortunate deal for some other money guys. Well, as could somewhat be expected given this industry’s track record so far, the money guys turned out to not be the best people, and said cultivator got squeezed out by the financiers. Now as I’ve said countless times here, the quality doesn’t sit in the strain, or the brand name—the quality comes from the cultivator. So, with that in mind, I am pleased to let you know about the NEW NEW from KiKi the botanical wizard. Debuting as ‘Life is Not Grape’, and with early packs starting to seep into the market, this is one you’re definitely going to keep your eye out for. He WILL be one of the biggest names in the game before long.
The Puro Company
Now, a LOT of people are rolling fat blunts these days and calling them ‘Cannagars’, but let me be the first to say, not all of these cigar-style blunts are created equal. In fact, much like moon rocks, it seems many ‘blunt-style’ products today are often filled with the trash producers know you won’t be able to see behind the paper, and then rolled in distillate and kief to seem like value. Well friends, allow me to put you on to the real, because when I’m talking Cannagars, this is what I mean. While some people want to go over the top with raw cannabis leaf wraps, or rose petals, the most important part to a fine Cannagar is the smoking experience, and it’s nearly impossible to beat The Puro Company’s products. While imitators will often leave you feeling jipped out of your bread, there is nothing more classy than smoking a quarter to the dome, so don’t cheap out on some machine rolled bullshit—a Puro is worth the ticket.
I’ve heard the folklore about Greasi for some time now. I too have been drooled over his string-cheese looking trichome shots on IG, but his cuts have always escaped my grasp. Having recently got my first chance to get my hands on his gear, I’m pleased to report that these buds were indeed worth waiting for. Greasi grows unique cuts that he’s been dialing in for years, and I was fortunate enough to sample his Cherry Land, Pistachio Gelato, his classic ’93 aka Octane, and Octane’s newest offspring, RO93. Each was as delightful as the cut before it. If I had to choose my favorite out of the slate I’d have to say the Pistachio Gelato was the most unique flavor I enjoyed, but all of these are absolute bleeders, and you won’t go wrong with any.
Keeping the big doink vibe alive, this next list mention is the new(ish) collaboration of two of my favorite industry insiders, Chump & Malikie, affectionately dubbed Chaliques, bc apparently that’s their names mashed together. I’m going to be honest, I’m not 1000% sure what these guys did before this, but they’ve always been in the right rooms, with the right people, with insane fire, and sweethearts to boot, so obviously they quickly became some of my favorite people to see around. But now? Now they’re on a whole new wave rolling what they call (& I fkn love) ‘forced collabs’—aka their expert hand rolls paired with unsuspecting a-grade flower & hash brands. I’ve only seen donuts from them so far, so not sure if there are any straight flower jawns coming for baby lungs like me, but let me tell you, just like a Dan’s Roll Up, these collaborations are not to be missed.
This is a new one, and it’s one I’ve admittedly had trouble finding out information about. Put onto my radar by my buddy from Sacred Fruits, I only got an eloquently branded eighth jar barred with the sheet music and lyrics ‘the best form of government is no government at all’, so clearly I was interested from the jump. But when I cracked the jar, that’s when the real party started, because there was a symphony hidden within this black glass. I don’t know much about Opera House, all I know for sure is that they also do joints, but I don’t know where or how you can get them, so just start listening for the music I guess…
Now, Cali-X has been making a bunch of noise lately. From their Zensi to their Zlime, I’ve smoked several cuts from that camp I’ve been a fan of so far, so I don’t want this to come off as a slight to their flower in any way, but man, however these guys are rolling their joints, the rest of the industry needs to take note. A TRUE 2 gram-er (before the weight of the glass tip), this is a truly regal feeling joint. As I mentioned earlier, there are few things classier than holding a fat cannagar, but for those of us that don’t want to fuck with tobacco—and I don’t blame you for that—this one’s the one for you.
Here’s one for the Colorado homies! I know this is sacrilegious for some, but I was immediately drawn to the attractive packaging on this one. With a beautiful and elegant etched jar, this is immediately a stand out ‘normalization’ brand, but I was pleased to quickly find out that it’s not just a pretty package, DB knows what they’re doing. Grown organically in living soil, Dutch Botanicals products are surprisingly just as beautiful as the jars that adorn the—with some of the terpiest tasting flower I’ve seen from Colorado—IN A PRE-ROLL!!! I honestly didn’t know anyone could actually do that. I also highly recommend their Grumpz live rosin for those that like to dabble in that world, as the flavor is even more outstanding in rosin.
Finally, and because you know I care about consumers at every price point, this last one’s a blunt you can smash without destroying your bank account. One of the latest brands from the growing cannabis kingpin Natura, I gotta say this brand just exudes fun. From their flashy packaging to their baseball theme, you really feel like you’re getting into the game with Sluggers—even if that game is just the new season of Stranger Things. Given that Natura is a one stop shop, these guys have everything, from flower to pre-roll packs to the hemp wrapped blunts the market has come to love. I should mention, although these are called blunts, these are also tobacco-free.
This is another one of those you heard it here first types, and there’s only so much I can even tell you. There is VERY little information available about these yet, except for that they’re unbelievably delicious, and incredibly potent. Made in the style of those classic ice cream cups with a dollop of strawberry syrup or chocolate fudge in the middle, these highly medicated frozen delights are starting to pop up in LA and NYC, and trust me, if you’re a fan of edibles, you’re going to want to ride this wave. Think an ice cream & weed nutcracker. As a connoisseur of designer ice cream I am confident in saying that not only will this have you on the floor with its potency, but it definitely stands up next to the greats in terms of ice cream quality as well. Now, this is probably going to be harder to cop than a Supreme drop (esp outside of the cities), but if you get a chance to grab a cup, don’t blink. These are going to be the hottest ticket of the summer…
House of Congo
There are a lot of people trying to capitalize on classic cultivars right now. From those trying to hunt true landraces, to those trying to recreate the original diesels and hazes with some modern firepower, but most are producing pretty lackluster results. However, I’m happy to report that the results I’ve seen from House of Congo has me holding out hope that we’ll get some of our OGs back someday. Bringing the ‘lowland equatorial sativa’ Red Congolese into 2022, this one’s the first real deal classic I’ve seen recreated, or rediscovered, yet. With a look that’s certainly been updated given today’s technology, rest assured that the stringy, harder to deal with sativa strain is just as energizing as you remember it, with a much more pungent taste.
BONUS: Gusto Green’s Tempura Hemp Leaves
I’ll be honest—I smoke green things, I don’t typically eat them, so when I heard about the Tempura Hemp Leaves I admittedly wasn’t dying to try them. Sure they look beautiful, and it’s an awesome way for a Michelin-star rated restaurant to give a nod to the culture, but are they actually delicious? BOY. I never thought I’d say this, but if regular restaurants started doing this I would literally be getting a side of Tempura leaves instead of fries with my burger from now on. They are BANGIN! Although totally unmedicated (so safe for those with baby or nonexistent tolerances as well), I know it’s fried but I’m super comfortable going on record and dubbing this the new superfood LA has been waiting for. It’s probably not a superfood, I don’t actually know what that means, but it IS super food. Located at the base of the new Green Street building in DTLA, you’re def going to want to pop in for some fried leaves the next time you’re in town.