Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: 9th Edition

Just in time for another 420 in quarantine, here’s s’more fun ways to mix things up and elevate your reality.
Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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Well, folks, with 420 around the corner you know I had to pop back in to drop some more quarantine cops on my people. I know we all thought this would be over by now, and that after missing the entire year of 420 because of quarantine mandates, we’d at least have 2021’s special day to look forward to but… well, wait…for a day that is supposed to be all about getting high, I think we’re actually gearing up to celebrate exactly how we’re meant to—from the couch! 

This month’s list for spending 420 in quarantine is laced with treats, sneakers, and even a virtual show to keep your spirits lifted despite probably not being with all your friends, but never fear—if you’re alone this holiday, join us in The Smoking Section on Clubhouse. We’ll be seshing all day and keeping the fam together. Join the flock.

As always, if there’s anything you see that needs to be on the next iteration of this list, don’t hesitate to reach out to me or the brand on Twitter and hit us with your picks—we ALL could use the lift right now! @joncappetta & @High_Times_Mag

22 Red’s LA Punk

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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Not going to lie, of course it was the cultivar name that got me on this one. Not only was this ‘LA Punk’, but it was SOAD’s Shavo Odadjian’s LA Punk, and considering he has been putting out some impressive flower under his 22 Red label, I had to try it. Immediately upon opening the package I was impressed with the buds. Before even noticing the nose, which is certainly there and reminiscent of other Cake-strains on the market, these deep green and almost blue leaved buds are exceptionally photogenic.

Complete with all the things you’d hope for in the jar, from dense buds that dance in the light thanks to their healthy trichome covering, to the orange hairs poking out of every possible crevice giving it that look that makes you want to hit the nugs with a jeweler’s loupe. It’s a true hybrid, so don’t expect to be couch-locked, but you will certainly feel the daze!

Pantry Cacao Keto Bites

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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I’m going to go right ahead and say I have no idea what the ‘keto’ element of this is, so don’t get excited that I’m here to help you lose weight—candidly I’m not even sure what ‘keto’ is because I thought it was just diet shit, but this, my friends…this is far from diet anything. Sure it’s a superfood, and naturally vegan, but I’m also sure you all know that’s not something that really triggers my spidey senses.

That said, these delicious little ‘Cacao Keto Bites’, which I’ve been calling Cocoa Nibs (almost entirely certainly incorrectly) because they taste like semi-sweet chocolate flowers, are DELICIOUS, and pack 5mg of THC per bite. While I love the edible space, I’ve become bored of gummies and chocolates in their normal form, so this was a very nice change up that you didn’t have to feel so childish while eating. They’re available at Sweet Flower shops across the state so if you’re trying to get high AND have a delicious little adult snack, pick these up.

Dr. Greenthumb’s Stundenglass

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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Macrodosers unite! This one’s for you. If you’ve ever hit a gravity bong and thought “there’s got to be a better way,” well fam, now there is. Coming out of the G-Pen family, the Stundenglass is a revolving glass contraption that’s basically the high-end version of what you used to make with a cut up water bottle, but designed in a way that recycles much of the smoke you’d miss in the former’s experience.

They call this thing a gravity hookah, and while that is an adequate enough title, we all know what they really mean. Complete with a hookah hose, or a regular old mouthpiece to shoot the smoke in your face, the Stundenglass is one of the best ways to maximize the high you’ll get from your buds because it just… keeps… going! Though it’s been out for a few years now, the new Dr. Greenthumb edition features a deep green and gold trim that elevates the whole unit. I’ve also seen people use this thing to smoke cocktails before so you know, the possibilities are basically endless!

Daniel Cohen’s 420 NFT Drop

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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From the mind who brought us the Periodic Table of Drugs, Daniel Cohen is back with another drop, this time playing into the NFT-galaxy, while still tying in some of his home planet faves. Aptly themed around the date it’s dropping on, this cannabis-infused art show will see the artist drop 10 new pieces, many a pretty strong departure from much of his past work.

Though you can expect to see a few new ‘elements’, this show relies heavily on the digital nature of this medium and involves more motion graphics, and some straight video segments. My personal favorite is a montage that captures the artist rolling up a blunt that evolves into a collection of good feelings reminiscent of a good high.

Overall this is one of the most unique shows I’ve seen released in this way to date. That said, it’s important to note that this auction is raising funds for the Weldon Project, which raises money to help get non-violent cannabis prisoners out of jail, so if you can, don’t miss the auction! Live on 420 on Nifty Gateway. Don’t just buy art; help cannabis prisoners!

Broke Boyz Ice Cream Bars

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
Courtesy of company

I’ve been hearing of Bars, Terpenstein, and the Broke Boyz for years now, but I finally got my ass up to Oakland a few weeks back around the opening of our flagship High Times Cannabis Market and got a chance to see what all the hype was about and I’ve gotta say, it’s clear who’s running the Bay right now.

From the folklore around all their products in both the legal and traditional market, to their hijacking of popular cultural references and pivoting them into cannabis memes, the Broke Boyz are clearly doing something right. The man himself came down to hang at our opening and broke me off with some of their Ice Cream Bars and, well, now I’m on the Broke Boy train. Keep an eye out for a very special release coming with 450 North Brewing “IndyCraftBrew” too, because you know these hype boiz couldn’t stick to JUST cannabis!

Glasshouse 420 Fest

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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Like last year, there’s a lot of virtual stuff going on to celebrate the holiday given that we still can’t fully assemble like we used to due to the COVID-caused quarantine, but in a sea of try-hards there are few really exciting the masses. One of those worth getting hyped over, though, is Glass House’s 420 Fest, which is  featuring Flying Lotus, Duckwrth, Blackillac, and comedy by Mike E. Winfield.

Live from somewhere in Los Angeles, this virtual concert aims to bridge the gap between virtual and real life with a very intimate performance happening in real-life, but telecasted out for all the out-of-towners (or those just not on the incredibly small list!). Even better, the concert is totally free, so tune in at 7pm to get down no matter where you happen to be—and if you don’t know, FlyLo is DEFINITELY worth checking out.

Tough Mama Preroll

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
Courtesy of company

Having just taken second place in our SoCal People’s Choice Cup, I had to get my hands on some of the Tough Mama’s and let me tell you, I am glad I did. This terpy *blunt* is the perfect nightcap after a long day. On top of the gram of flower there’s also a quarter gram of THC oil in there to maximize it’s relaxing effects. I’m not sure if they’re all the same strain by type, but I had the Wedding Crasher (Indica) and let me tell you, this preroll certainly helped me crash out.

The most surprising part here, and the thing that I think serves the best lesson for newcomers to legal purchasing, is that this 15.6% preroll SMACKED. Everyone’s racing to find the highest numbers, but as we’ve said in the past the terps involved are far more important than the THC count alone, and if the trophy didn’t already prove it, allow me to be another cosign.

Dogma Cannabis

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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I often wax on the benefit of prerolls due to the ease of use of the product, but let’s face it—nothing hits quite like a hand roll. In that spirit, while also remembering we’re trying to maximize our time here, I want to introduce you all to Dogma Cannabis, a smalls brand out of the Van Doran portfolio. These guys offer both trimmed and untrimmed varieties of choice smalls in sizes more comfortable for heavy users without breaking your bank.

My favorite of the line however, which I’m sure I’ll get some slack for, is their pre-ground ounce jar. For someone that loves to roll his own, there’s no quicker way to get your doob together than with this ready to go blend. Even better though, the jars are sold with post cards that feature local animals available at shelters to help promote adopting, and to help save as many animals from kill shelters as possible. Pot that helps save pups? Yes please.

Old Pal’s Grow Your Own Kit

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
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Just like rolling your own, there’s nothing quite like growing your grass yourself. In this spirit, Old Pal’s set up a super fun program to help more consumers out there discover the beauty of caring for your crop, and I’ve got to say, I’ve had my plant for a week now and it’s basically become my girlfriend.

These 28-40 day old plants are half grown, meaning most of the hard work is done and you basically just have to put her in the sun, water her, and give her love for a while. The strain, Tri-cross, is an autoflower, so after just a few weeks you’ll be ready to harvest with minimal effort, and soon you’ll be reaping the rewards you helped sow, having developed a whole new love for the buds you consume in the process.

Adidas Campus 80S South Park Towelie Shoes

Jon’s Stone-Cold Quarantine Cop List: Ninth Edition
Courtesy of company

If you go back to the first edition of this list there’s a mention in there of last year’s Nike 420 drop (which didn’t happen). Those guys have been bringing heat for years around our favorite high holiday. However, they’re being a bit dodgy about this year’s drop—maybe called ‘Maui’, maybe ‘Hawaii’, maybe not even dropping on 420—but one brand has gone all in to make sure everyone knows they’re supporting the culture in a fun way.

This year, Adidas is dropping ‘Towelies’, a Towelie from South Park-themed Campus 80S. Covered in terry loop textile and complete with stash pockets in the tongue, and eyes that turn red in the sunlight, Adidas has gone all the way in on a stand out yet regular-wear pair of kicks. Even better, these are only running $100 at release, so while there are almost certainly limited numbers, you won’t have to break the bank to get the steeze!

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